Wednesday, March 05, 2008

What Is Consciousness?

Dear Friends,

What Is Consciousness?

Webster says consciousness is awareness, sensitivity, and the ability to perceive the relationship between oneself and one's environment.

We use our conscious mind when we are thinking logically or carefully. Your referability resides inside your conscious referable behavior.

I walked into an open house on Saturday and was greeted by Sarah the realtor.
Sarah walked me around the house, and described it to me in great detail. She asked me a few questions "How long have I been shopping for?", "How many bedrooms did I want?", you know all the "Standard" questions realtor's ask.

Then Shara started telling me about herself and her company, how she's the #1 realtor in the ares, how her company has been in business for over x amount of years. 10 more minutes of blah, blah, blah, blah.... About herself

My cell phone rang and I asked Sarah to excuse me for a minute.

Once I was done with my Sarah walked me down stairs and started telling me even more reasons why I should do business with her, she lives in the area with her 2 small children. and that she can find me listings before anyone else can. I thought to myself if I was the average customer would I even know what a "listing" was?

I thanked Sarah for her time, she handed me a business card and asked me to sign the guest book. i walked over to the guest book and filled out my name Jeffrey Stanton, 908-421-5247, then my email

Sarah look at the book and asked me if i was the "E-Mail Guy". I said yes that's me. She told me she gets them all the time and there great.

Sarah then asked me if she could pick my brain for a min.
(I love these moments, cause they always turn into a coaching, and that's what I live for. The chance to help people)

She asked me questions about referrals and some advice on how to get them, its all about referable behaviors .

I gave her 10 quick thoughts that came to mind that are referable behaviors.
Over the past years, I have compiled a list of over 1,000 ways to improve your referability.

These are the ones I gave her:

  1. Tell the truth, no matter what
  2. Be on time
  3. Make no assumptions and always ask the question behind the question. What is important about ______, to you?
  4. Check your thinking
  5. Acknowledge people frequently with notes.
  6. Quickly admit when you’re wrong.
  7. Say 'please' and 'thank you'.
  8. Give people permission to share how they feel about your service. Be hungry for feedback.
  9. Speak with confidence and passion, do your homework and never wing it. If you don’t know the answer, say so.
  10. Be more interested then interesting

I brought into her consciousness, that referable relationships have and equal amounts of give and take.

It was painful for her at first to recognize this; however, after 5 minutes of playing the question game, Sarah became aware of how unskilled he was at being interested, she never asked me one real question about me.

She was unconscious to the fact that she wanted to be interesting more then he wanted to be interested.

How many sales people when speaking to a client talk all about themselves?
They may talk about what those letters are after their names (ABR, ABRM, ALC, CCIM, CIPS, CPM, CRB, CRS®, CRE, GAA, PMN, RCE, ABC, XYZ).
They may tell them why they should list with them, why they are the best, how fast they sell houses, and how nice the home is, among many other things.

The sales person thinks that they are taking about the customer, but they are really just talking about themselves.

How many sales people are more interested in there client then they want to be interesting?

Not many…

That the difference between being a transactional based sales person and relationship based consultant.

So, look at the list of ten behaviors that I gave to Sarah.

Which ones can you bring into conscious constructive behavior?

Rain falls as a result of a change in the temperature, so in a like manner, a change in your referability happens as a result of a change in your state of consciousness.

Today’s 3 Minute Referral Tip.

You Must Develop A Referability Consciousness, and Please Be More Interested Then Interesting.

Thanks for spending 3 minutes with me...
The best is yet to be!

On Your Team
Jeffrey Stanton
Your Trusted Advisor For Life

One of the fastest ways to build a successful referral based business is by training. Now, with me, I like to invest significant time immersing myself in training, while some people prefer to take it in bite-size chunks. Whatever your preference is, now is the best time to contact me.

If you have found this tip useful, please share it with any friends, family, colleagues and associates who you think will be interested. Feel free to print it (with credit and subscription information) and continue to enjoy the tips. I am always grateful for any comments, criticisms or other feedback that you may have. Please send them to

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