Dear Friends,
I have a standing invitation to everyone who reads http://www.jeffreysjournal.com/ to ask me to write about what you want to learn more about. Taylor M had the following question:
Jeff,
I have been reading your last few tips on rapport and persuasion, and I was wondering if you could go into how to generate rapport over the telephone. I have spoken on the phone to other sales people trying to sell me stuff. I have felt more at ease talking to some of them than I do with my customers or soon-to-be clients, even people I have known for years. It is fantastic and I'm not sure how exactly how it happens or how they do it....
The answer is… well, a bunch of things.
First of all, I don’t know exactly what the people Taylor has spoken to have been doing, or what Taylor is not doing himself, but I do know that there are a number of things which will help you to get rapport, put people at ease and have more fluid, enjoyable telephone conversations.
The first thing is to know what you want with regard to a particular conversation.
With regard to some upcoming phone conversation, what do you want?
And how will you know when you’ve got it?
Having a clear idea of what direction you want to go in will allow you to get good feedback about whether or not you’re on track. Obviously, the amount of time you spend figuring out what you want with regard to a call will depend on how important the call is to you.
Get in a good state.
I’ve heard my mentor say repeatedly "If you want to get someone into a good state, go there first yourself." If you want other people to feel relaxed & at ease, make sure you feel relaxed & at ease.
Establish rapport
Now, there are many ways to establish rapport. Some of the behavioural ways you can do this on the phone include the following:
Talking at the same rate as the other person
Modulating your voice tone so that it is similar to theirs
Modulating voice pitch so it’s similar to theirs
Using the same sensory words as them
Talking at the rate they’re breathing
Personally, I find it difficult to breathe at the same rate as someone else if they’re talking.
I do, however, like talking at the same rate that someone is breathing.
How do you know what rate they’re breathing at?
Listen to them talk (if they’re talking, they’re breathing out.)
Listen to them breathe
Can you hear someone breathe over the phone?
Sure, if you listen.
Make a mental image of the person
Another trick of the trade is to make a mental image of the person you are speaking to. See the expressions on their face, notice how they respond to what you say. And whatever you do, start by pretending / believing that the call is going to have a positive result for you both.
Be curious about & interested in the other person
Of all the points, this is one of the most powerful. Some of the most powerful messages you can give to someone are "I am interested in you", "I care about your well being" and "You are important to me." And the quickest way to get these ideas across in your communication is to mean it. When you mean it, you come across congruently, and the communication can flow.
Sometimes, people get so caught up in the technology of rapport (matching eye blinks etc) that they don’t remember what it’s about: connecting with another human being.
The behavioural elements of rapport are just a way to allow that connection to emerge more rapidly.
All Related Topics: 3 Minute Rapport/Persuasion
Thanks for spending 3 minutes with me...
The best is yet to be!
On Your Team
Jeffrey Stanton
Your Trusted Advisor For Life
One of the fastest ways to build a successful referral based business is by training. Now, with me, I like to invest significant time immersing myself in training, while some people prefer to take it in bite-size chunks. Whatever your preference is, now is the best time to contact me.
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